Balance. What an overused word these days. I am ready to end my relationship with the word balance. And here’s why…
I feel like we are constantly working towards maintaining this impossible state of balance in our lives, and always left feeling disappointed and defeated when it doesn’t happen.
Or even if it miraculously does happen, it’s for like 3 minutes, right?!
Because the house will get messy again. The bills will need to be paid again. The fridge will need to be stocked again. The workout will need to happen again. The mediation will be necessary again. The water will need to be chugged again. The kids will need a ride somewhere again. The project will have a deadline again.
These are ongoing life moments, that we are BLESSED to be able to experience…whether or not we decide to be grateful for it is totally our choice.
But why are we waiting for this pinnacle moment when it’s all “taken care” of? Won’t that mean life is sorta done?!
And why do we maintain this expectation that we are supposed to have it all taken care of at the -EXACT SAME- time or capacity?
Guys! Perfect balance in our lives is impossible. There will always be something that requires more of our effort or attention at any given time. And there is nothing WRONG with that! That’s LIFE! So why the F do we get angry or frustrated about it? As we work tirelessly to have it all balanced out.
Listen, go stand on one foot for 30 seconds. Chances are, it’s a little shaky, might fall over, might not feel so hot. Do we intentionally walk around on one foot all day willingly? Probably not by choice, right?!
So why is it that we are presently doing one thing (say, family time) while we are thinking about the laundry or the work deadline or the client who needs us? Then we bury ourselves in guilt for feeling like we can’t MANAGE all of it.
It’s exactly like trying to just stand on one foot. We are choosing to struggle, instead of understanding that there will always be things in life that will require MORE of us at any given time.
More effort. More heart. More love. More time. More mental strength. More emotion. More creativity.
And if we are giving something more, then something else will be getting a little less, and there will always be a natural imbalance that we really should just start to EMBRACE!!
I’m not saying that we can’t have it all and do it all. But do we really HAVE to?! That’s all a choice, too, peeps. I’m simply saying let’s replace the word balance with HARMONY!
Accept the imbalances.
If the house is a mess but you’re playing with the kids, find the harmony in the present moment of joy. If work has been slammed but you’re making shit happen, find the harmony in your efforts! If you feel bad for taking time for yourself because the to-do list is a mile long, find harmony in your choice to make yourself a priority in YOUR OWN LIFE!
Balance is a bad word, not because of its meaning in the dictionary, but for what we allow it to mean for ourselves!
We define ourselves based on our productivity, our success, the size of our pants and how much we appear to have our shit together.
And it’s effin exhausting. It’s no way to live. But who says we have to? Social media? Marketing ads? Other people you “see” who seem to be doing it all better than you?
I call bullshit.
I want harmony. In fact, here and now I am declaring my desire for HARMONY to the universe and I am open to enjoying harmony in all the areas of my life!
Mmmmhmmmmm. That feels good just to SAY, doesn’t it?!
I’m gonna end with this…when you see someone actually balancing themselves, like on a balance beam or a tightrope, it’s totally nerve wracking and only lasts a few seconds or minutes. No more than a few moments of time are they holding themselves steady. And it looks so damn hard and I’m often sweating as I witness it. So why, oh why do make that a GOAL? Whyyyyy do we try to live every moment of our lives BALANCING?
It’s like instant stress ball syndrome, and who needs another reason to be a sweaty mess?
I encourage you to release the need and urgency for balance, and invite in more harmony…just for a second, just to see how it feels😉
Much love, Ta xoxo